14 Facts You Probably Don’t Know about Hitler

History has a special distaste for the unctuous, mustachioed little politician who spent the 1930s worming his way to the top tier of a bowed and broken German government. Adolf Hitler rightfully earned his spot as one of history’s greatest monsters when he seized control of the German government, attacked the world around him, and oversaw one of the worst genocides in history. The man sucks, people. And yet, in spite of his obvious evilness, there still remains a fascination about Adolf Hitler that has persisted. What was it that turned this guy into such a vile nut job? What events in his life led him to take on the mantle of history’s greatest d-bag? You know the big stuff, but here are a few things you may not know.

1. He Really Sucked At Art

Sure, you know that Adolf Hitler attempted to become an artist at one point in his life. We all do; it’s called being nineteen. What you may not know, however, is that Hitler was a terrible artist. “He was rejected twice by the Academy of Fine Arts Vienna (1907-1908), because of his ‘unfitness for painting.’” Let’s be honest, while technically apt, it doesn’t take an art critic to see that Hitler would have been lucky to secure a job doing room portraits for the Holiday Inn.

2. Oh that ‘Stache

Everyone who knows Hitler knows about his incredibly silly yet iconic mustache. According to myth, though, a younger Hitler actually preferred to rock a handlebar mustache … until a superior told him to shave it so a gas mask would fit over his head. Of course, the trim didn’t help; Hitler “was temporarily blinded by a British gas shell” in 1918.

3. He Loved That Skrilla

In spite of Hitler’s whole down-to-earth vibe, the supreme leader was actually a pretty crazy spender. According to a recent biographer, Hitler in fact spent thousands on everything from cars to clothes to extravagant food and booze.

4. He Was A Fan of the Mouse House

There’s long been a rumor that animation pioneer Walt Disney was both an anti-Semite and a Nazi sympathizer. What you may not know is that the Nazis loved Disney back. Hitler, in particular, was said to be fascinated with the technology driving Disney’s first animated masterpiece, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

5. Beware of (Talking) Dog

Alright, so you know that Hitler was a nut for the paranormal, but you may not be aware that he was also a nut for the adorable. According to sources, “Hitler and his henchman rounded up ‘educated’ dogs with whom they communicated (through tapping paws, barking, and wagging their tails).” Apparently, these efforts were supposed to help spur a win in the war … okay, before you go criticizing, are you going to tell me that if you had complete control of a country, you wouldn’t try to do the exact same thing?

6. In His Youth, He Had a Crush On a Jew

When Hitler was but a lad in Germany, it just so happened that one day, while on a stroll with her mother, young Stephanie Isak happened to glance in the direction of a future genocidal madman. Of course, being the super well-adjusted young man he was, Adolf immediately became obsessed with this Jewish girl, once confessing to a childhood friend that he was so lovesick he “considered suicide. ‘He would jump into the river from the Danube bridge … and then it would be over and done with. But Stefanie would have to die with him, he insisted on that.”

7. He Had Particular Methods of Practicing

Everyone has seen Adolf Hitler yammering on in German and been told that he was a wizard at electrifying a German crowd. He was supposedly one of the most magnetic speakers in the modern age. Of course, like any good athlete, he demanded that a photographer take his picture while he was speaking, so the Fuhrer could check himself out afterwards and improve his game … and indulge in his insane megalomania.

8. He Who Smelt It

This one isn’t even really long enough to fill up a whole slide, I’m going to admit. Still, though, it bares mentioning. Due to extreme gastrointestinal issues, Hitler farted a lot. A lot. Just a bit of Hitler trivia for your next cocktail party.

9. Hitler LOVED Drugs

Here’s a fun fact! Adolf Hitler would pretty much take or inject anything he could get his hands on, and as the Fuhrer, he could get his hands on a lot. Hitler was a coke addict, he injected himself with bull semen to improve sexual performance, and he was apparently on a mix of 28 meds in the final days of the Reich. Which makes sense. You’d have to be high to do some of the stuff he did.

10. Hitler Was Super Into His Niece … Until Her Mysterious Death

Described as, “the only truly deep love affair of [Hitler’s] life” Geli Raubal was the apple of Hitler’s eye (though their sexual history is up for debate). Things looked great for the captivating young beauty, until “she was found dead in her bedroom in Hitler’s Munich apartment with a bullet through her chest and Hitler’s gun by her side.” Golly, wonder who’s responsible for that unsolved murder?

11. A Weird Family Connection

After the fall of Saddam Hussein, his bunker was completely looted; destroyed from head to toe as the people swarmed in and stole everything that wasn’t nailed down. What you may not know is that the man who designed Hussein’s bunker, “was the grandson of the woman who designed Hitler’s bunker.” See, this is the problem with the evil architecture game; it’s so slanted with nepotism.

12. Hitler Only Had One Testicle

Long has the urban legend been going around that the Fuhrer only had one nut. Of course, the prevailing theory was that he lost the first one in World War I. That isn’t true. According to documents dug up late last year, Hitler, “suffered from ‘right-side cryptorchidism,’ or an undescended right testicle.”

13. The Story of William Patrick Hitler

So, on the level, William Patrick Hitler was a bit of an opportunist. Born the son of Hitler’s brother Alois, old Bill actually spent five years in 1933 working for his uncle. It was only when his paranoia overwhelmed his ambition that he fled to the States, writing an article called “Why I Hate My Uncle”. He later served in the Navy in WWII earning a Purple Heart. He spent the rest of his life in the U.S. analyzing blood samples for labs, marrying, and having four children.

14. Hitler’s Body Went Missing For Years

After Hitler committed suicide in 1945, as the Soviets were basically knocking on his door, the invading army reported finding no sign of the deceased leader. It wasn’t until years later that Nazis in the bunker revealed that once Hitler offed himself, loyal stooges wrapped his body, took it out on the lawn, and torched it. No one in the invading army considered that one of the charred bodies in front of the Fuhrer’s fortress might be the reviled leader.